The Cupcake of Wisdom

The infinitely moist chocolate cupcake melts smoothly inside the mouth. It wasn't perfect, but it wasn't far away from it either. While the combination of bread and cacao dissipate in a fluid motion, the taste buds start to scream in pleasure and ecstasy. Then, just as quickly as it came, it was gone. I take another bite.

Okay. There was an attempt to make you want to eat said cupcake.
In all likelihood, you're probably scrolling down with your right hand with your left hand supporting your head, not caring about any cupcakes in any way.

Meh.

Today, I shall speak of practical wisdom.
There are three things you want to demonstrate that you are a wise person. Of course, this does not necessitate any actual wisdom, so if you are of a particular hair color, do not worry. You, too, can be "wise".

First of all, you should show off your experience. Show them that you've fought in various battles, slaying enemies one by one. Show them that you know your jazz and that you've had countless detentions, demonstrating your badassery. Show them that you've read the books before the movies went mainstream. So on and so forth.

Secondly, bend the rules accordingly, given that it doesn't intervene with the audience's virtues and values and all the stuff that matters. Be street smart. Stuff like that, yadda, yadda.

Finally, avoid extremes (or as the author of this fine book says, "seem to take the middle course"). This one should be obvious.

Let us think of a hypothetical situation (which, seemingly, one of the presidential candidates do not seem to feel a fondness for). If someone asked me whether I was a good student, I would go on to show all the AP's I'm taking while simultaneously showing that I bend the rules by constantly touching things that say "do not touch" on them.

Then I'd go on to say I'm not really that smart nor as stupid as certain people with certain hair color. Yep, that demonstrates my wisdom. Definitely.

Okay, but seriously, if done correctly, it would be amazing.
Oh, and before it's too late, the "certain hair color" I mentioned was a dark vermilion with polka dotted viridian dots and inconspicuous violet striped (with a touch of dirty orange). Before it's too late, if anyone does have such hair, I'm sorry.

Anyways, follow those rules, and you will, indeed, appear smart.
Then, maybe, you'd get the cupcake... given that it is not a lie.